Skip to Content
Serving Iowa Families Statewide

Creating Consistent Rules for Your Children with Your Former Spouse

Stability is an essential component for children and, after a divorce, it may feel like life is in a state of chaos. Uncertainty can make your children feel anxious about the future and ultimately result in them acting out, so it is important to work with your former spouse to create some consistent rules and routines that will facilitate a more predictable environment that eases their fears and concerns.

It may be somewhat of a challenge to collaborate with your ex-spouse to create a set of consistent rules and routines for your children, but doing so can reduce conflict in your co-parenting relationship and contribute to the wellbeing and happiness of your children.

Collaborating Toward Consistency and Stability

With you and your former spouse living in two separate homes, it may be easy for you to assume that you can run your households however you see fit, even if you contradict each other. Unfortunately, this is detrimental to your children’s sense of security. Therefore, you must collaborate to create some consistency across both households, so that your children know what to expect and feel less apprehensive about this new situation.

Moreover, consistent rules and routines will help your children learn about boundaries and how to develop healthier habits. Although you may not be able to keep identical routines in both households due to differing schedules or other variables, aim to keep them as fundamentally similar as possible.

Here are some of the rules and routines you should discuss:

  • Morning routines
  • After-school routines
  • Bedtime routines
  • Curfew
  • Rewards for good behavior
  • Consequences for bad behavior

You should also discuss whether or not there are any issues that warrant some flexibility. For example, maybe curfew is an issue on which you do not believe there should be any flexibility. Additionally, you may have to revisit some of these issues if putting certain rules into practice are easier said than done, so be prepared to continue to have these discussions with your co-parent.

Schedule a Consultation with a Knowledgeable Attorney Today!

Co-parenting after a divorce can be a difficult task and, in some cases, former spouses may continue to need legal guidance when the obstacles are too great to overcome on their own. At Hope Law Firm, our family law team has litigated more than 1,000 family law cases with favorable results. You can rely on our skilled team to provide the compassionate legal assistance you need to help you navigate the sensitive legal matters you are facing.

Contact our law office today at (515) 305-2772 to request an initial consultation with a member of our team.